Where Does It All End … or
Begin?
My eyes filled with water as I peered
at the computer screen, editing this week's Page One story about Christopher
McDonough. It's not an uncommon occurrence when I read about a young
person whose life comes to an abrupt halt, for whatever reason. I
suspect others experience the same sickening sensation when encountering
such morbid tales, even if they do not harbor the personal demons
spawned by having lived through the horror of losing a child. The
demons never leave. You just try hard as you can, every day, to hold
them at bay. You occupy yourself with friends, family and deeds that
dull the pain - you hope.
As someone who has outlived his child, even I cannot imagine what
Christopher McDonough's family is going through right now, and will
be feeling for an indeterminate period. Death by accident is, I have
to assume, cause for more violent despair at the moment of loss than
losing a child to the more deliberate drumbeat of heart disease, as
was the case with our son Harrison in March 2003.
At the risk of venturing into very dark and dangerous territory indeed,
there is more going on in society, if not in this particular circumstance,
than some parents are prepared to deal with: Old Demon Alcohol, as
Ray Davies of British pop group The Kinks all too aptly dubbed it.
We're not talking right now about this incident, because at this writing,
we do not know for certain what happened. We're talking about the
inevitability of more teenage vehicular fatalities that this publication
is fated to report, certain of which are bound to involve the illegal
consumption of controlled substances. We all know parents who inexplicably
enable underage drinking in the name of all that is cool and cavalier.
After all, the unthinkable never is going to happen to "my kid,"
goes the refrain, followed by such pearls of wisdom as, "Better
for them to start drinking early, so it's not forbidden fruit"
and "I can't control what they do once they get to college, or
in my own home, for that matter," and - the piece de resistance
-- "It's not a real crime. They should change the drinking age
back to 18 anyhow, like when we were teenagers."
Come to think of it, since there are so many indisputable reasons
that resourceful parents come up with to explain away underage drinking
in their presence, please send us your favorite reason, and we'll
publish it, along with your name. After all, you're really not doing
anything wrong, or to be ashamed of. Are you?
To help answer that question, contact Alliance for Safe Kids (ASK)
at (914) 736-0498 or (914) 245-6123 x26. It's a Yorktown-based community
outreach organization we're proud to support, and which is funded
in part by New York State grants.
